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如何淡化雅思寫作模版痕跡

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  分析真題鏈接:In some countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.以上是劍

  橋中的考試真題,相信大家都已經非常熟悉了。我們就一起結合此題,對雙邊結構的整體文章結構和遣詞造句做一個簡單的對比。

  淡化雅思寫作模版痕跡

  1. 引言段

  引言段是通篇作文的開篇之作,對于它的寫法多種多樣。但是無論怎樣書寫,切忌出現以下模式性的語句樣式:

  模板語言:

  Nowadays, the discussion about ……is a very controversial one. Those who criticize……. argue that……, but people who advocate……, on the other hand, maintain that……

  這樣的模板相信大家不會陌生,它曾經受到無數考生的青睞。但是我們說過,這樣過于機械的語言,很難體現出考生對考題文字的理解,更為糟糕的是,你的開頭有可能和無數人是重復的!下面我們就做一個簡單的對比:

  非模板語言:

  No matter in which country, children are, without any exception, regarded as the protected in society, not to mention making them involved in any forms of paid-work(調用背景知識,引出話題).The necessity of allowing them to make money with their own hands is indeed worth discussing(結合對考題文字的統一轉換,自然流露雙邊討論傾向)淡化雅思寫作模版痕跡

  2. 主體段

  模板語言:

  1. The benefits of…… can be perceived in many aspects. In the first place, 分論點一. For instance, 例證 / 語言論證。In the second place, 分論點二. 論證. 2. However, ……has also given rise to a lot of problems. For one thing,……For another……, Finally,……

  在傳統的模板里,雙邊結構的主體段只是簡單地分段論證兩方面的觀點,雖然將兩種對立觀點展現的非常清晰,但是也難免落入模式化的俗套。

  做一個簡單的對比:

  非模板語言:

  a. 讓步分析Admittedly, hardship and bitterness of life could drive people to become mature. Under working pressure, children think about finishing their tasks before the deadline instead of concerning how to kill their seemingly limitless free time. Work may be the only priority of their life. It is fairly different between taking a dollar from their parents and earning one by themselves. Only the tough reality can force them to get rid of selfishness and dependence on their parents, which is exactly one of the most urgently needed cures in parental education.雙邊結構的一個重要特點就是雙邊論證兩種觀點,在這篇文章里可以先讓步論證一個觀點,這樣可以為后一個觀點的論證提供很好的對比。

  b. 轉折過渡+提出觀點However, everything is mixed blessing. Employing children to work should be viewed as a harsh treatment and abuse to them. Kids, after all, unlike adults, are immature both physically and psychologically. They are extremely vulnerable to both occupational hazards and social evils. More importantly, children are at the golden age for learning not only due to their brain structure but also their curiosity and desire for knowledge. It goes without saying that the silly action permitting children to work for financial reasons is ridiculous.雙邊結構的第二段要論述對立面的觀點,但是不同于上一段的是,此段不僅要充分的客觀陳述一種觀點同時還要帶有觀點傾向,因為要完成文章的第二個任務――提出自己的觀點。筆者認為這樣的觀點提法比較自然,不需要另起一段提出而顯得比較呆板。

  淡化雅思寫作模版痕跡

  3. 結尾段

  模板語言:

  In the final analysis, I concede that to some extent whether the ultimate effect of phenomena is good or not, one thing is certain that phenomenon in itself is neither good nor bad. And it is the uses to which it is put that determine its value to society. I am convinced that___________.做一個簡單的對比:

  非模板語言:

  In conclusion, although there lies various excuses for letting the young children work for salary, it is pointless that this way could benefit them in terms of accumulating work experience and learning the meaning of responsibility. (自然流露觀點傾向)作為雙邊結構作文的結尾,需要總結全文,即主體段兩段的大意,同時要結合題目本身的特點提出鮮明的個人觀點。

  總結和上篇文章一樣,建議各位考生:不要盲目追求所謂模板,要注重靈活度。筆者認為,中國考生寫作得分低,除了語法這個大問題以外,其實一味背誦模板甚至隨處套用所謂“萬能模板”是丟分的一大原因。寫作的最高境界就是把各種連接化于無形,實現語義的自然銜接。考生必須根據考題的要求,調用自己原有的語言配上正確的語法,使作文具有鮮明的個人特色,侃侃而談。在考場中,拉近與考官的距離而不是設置一道冷冰冰的“模板墻”。

  誠然,靈活、合理地運用,將會淡化雅思寫作模版痕跡能在短時間內幫助雅思寫作基礎比較差的考生提高不少,但是如果想要真正獲得高分的雅思寫作,那么就必須突破突破雅思寫作模板才能獲雅思考官的青睞。

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