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放開去愛:找回愛的魔力

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As I was driving around today, I heard the song, "Cruel Summer" by Bananarama.

我今天正開著車四處轉,聽到了香蕉女郎組合的《無情的夏日》這首歌。

It came out in 1984 during the summer, and I remember the woman I was dating. It was my college girlfriend, Ellen. I graduated college and I was so in love. We were six months into the relationship, and I couldn't believe we had to be apart the following year. We talked about it all summer, trying to think of ways we could make it work.

這首歌是在1984的夏天流行的,我還記得當時正在交往的那個女人。她是我大學時的女朋友艾倫,我畢業了,還沉浸在愛情之中。我們交往了6個月,我無法相信第二年我們不得不分別。整個夏天我們都在討論這件事,努力想要找到解決方法。

She was going to take the train to me every other weekend. We would spend four days together in the month, and it would be fine. It was so innocent, captivating and beautiful. I remember falling in love again when I was 24. I couldn't believe the overwhelming feeling I had for another person. It was as if I'd swallowed some drug that left me feeling a little bit crazy.

她每隔一個周末坐火車來看我一次,一個月當中我們有四天時間待在一起,這也不錯。那時多么天真,多么迷人,多么美好。我記得24歲時再次墜入愛河,我無法相信對另外一個人產生了那種勢不可擋的感覺,就好像我吞下了某種毒品,感覺有點瘋狂。

Now, I see myself as a grown man and I wonder, "What happened to the magic of being in love? Why doesn't it feel the way it used to feel?"

現在我覺著自己成熟了,我就想:“戀愛的魔力哪去了?為什么我的感覺不似從前了?”

While I was driving, I decided I was going to figure this out for all of us, and I came to this conclusion: Love doesn't feel like it used to because people are much more screwed up now. We're a society of people who live in fear. The one thing we all want is the thing we fear the most. When we were kids, we knew how to let go, but now we're adults and we're stiff.

開著車,我就決定要為我們所有人弄清楚這件事,我得出了這個結論:愛情的感覺不似從前是因為人們現在更心煩意亂了。我們是一群活在恐懼中的人,我們都想得到的就是我們最害怕的。兒時我們知道如何放手,但現在成年的我們變得呆板了。

We want to be open, but we over analyze everything. We think there's a game that needs to be played. If you get back to somebody too quickly, you're going to be showing your cards, so you have to play it cool. We have all these games and rules people created. When we were younger we felt free to be vulnerable and offer our hearts.

我們想要敞開心扉,但對一切我們都想得太多。我們以為這是一場需要玩的游戲。如果你太快給別人答復,就亮出了自己的底牌,所以你要耍酷。人們創造了所有這些游戲和規則,我們年幼時容易付出真心,同時也易受傷害。

It becomes all about ego when we get older. Our egos are "protecting" us from falling in love. That's what's so sad. Love is what we all need. Love is what all of us desire. Love is all we're ever going to care about the day we die. We're not going to care about that great BMW we bought; we're going to remember the feelings we got from the people in our lives. That's what love is. Love is being heard, love is being seen, love is being felt. Love is being vulnerable to feel your emotions.

隨著年齡增長我們變得自我,“保護著”自己不要墜入愛河,多悲哀呀。愛情是我們都需要的,是我們所有人都渴望的,是我們死去的那一天仍然在乎的東西。我們不會在乎我們買的大寶馬;我們會記得生命中的人給我們的感覺。這就是愛,愛就是被聽到,被看到,被感受到。愛就是容易感受到自己的情緒。

Love is listening. Love is embracing. Love is kissing. Love is touching. The magic is still there. We just have to tap into that magic. And we need to tap into it fast, because the older we get, the more the stories and fears become real.

愛是傾聽,是擁抱,是親吻,是觸摸。愛的魔力仍在,我們只需要進入魔力之中,而且速度要快,因為我們年齡越大,故事和恐懼就變得越真實。

When we were younger, our stories were about innocence and falling in love. We yearned for something we knew nothing about. Now we understand that what we want has previously brought us pain and fear and agony.

我們年幼時,故事里滿是天真和戀愛,我們渴望未知的東西。現在我們知道了想要的東西曾給我們帶來痛苦、恐懼和苦惱。

Love is a beautiful thing. Let love grow inside your heart and watch the love that comes out in the people around you.

愛是美好的。讓愛在你內心生長,看著愛在你周圍人中開花結果。


 


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