免费黄网站-免费黄网站在线看-免费黄色-免费黄色a-亚洲va欧美va国产-亚洲va中文字幕欧美不卡

手機(jī)版

Fun at State Highway

閱讀 :

  When I was with the Maryland State Highway Administration, if you weren't part of the problem, all that meant is that you were working without the direct supervision of a Senior Manager.

  At a public hearing held by the Maryland State Highway Administration for the purpose of citizens to comment on the "alternates" on building a new roadway which would claim a great deal of housing or fertile farmland or some really scenic areas, an elderly farmer stood up to take his turn in the crowded room:

  "Y'all got some damn smart engineers there, don't ya ?"

  (The moderator assured the speaker many were highly qualified.)

  "Y'all got some that ain't so damn smart too, don't ya ?

  (The moderator agreed that indeed some had more experience.)

  The man paused and scratched his head, then concluded with,

  "Damn hard to tell the difference, ain't it ?"

  My Boss had a sign on his wall that always gave me pause:

  "Beware. Age and treachery always triumph over youth and talent."

  This one Senior Manager hired a consultant to evaluate pay equity, and spent in excess of $380,000 on the study.

  The Administrator then determined that only $8,750 remained in the budget to make the recommended salary adjustments.

  Right or wrong, a good number of openings for summer jobs at the State Highway were filled by the sons and daughters of our upper level management. Most of the career employees treated these privileged few with kid gloves. I however had never been accused of having good common sense. It was my unpleasant chore to dress down one of the soon-to-be rising stars (the son of our Chief Engineer) for a rather costly error he had made.

  After I finished, apparently unable to think of anything else to say, the lad stammered,

  "Do you know who my Father is ?"

  I paused, looked at him, then said in my most sympathetic voice,

  "Why no, I'm afraid I don't. Don't you ?"

  Quote from a infamous Quality Assurance meeting:

  "We are going to continue having these meetings, everyday, until I find out why no work is getting done."

  Quote from a Senior Manager……

  "I didn't say it was your fault.

  I said I was going to blame it on you."

  A motivational sign at work:

  "The beatings will continue until morale improves.

  A direct quote from the Boss:

  "We passed over a lot of good people to get the ones we hired."

  And get this quote from a telephone inquiry concerning a summer student position:

  "We're only hiring one summer intern this year and we won't start interviewing candidates for that position until the Boss'

  daughter finishes her summer classes."

  A lot of the Senior Managers at the Maryland State Highway frequently got lost in thought; but that's only because it was unfamiliar territory.

  My Boss said to me one time:

  "What you see as a glass ceiling, I see as a protective barrier."

  I always thought all the Senior Managers needed surge protectors. I reasoned that way their mouths would be buffered from surprise spikes in their brains.

  I always thought my Boss was a bastard, and retired, to work for myself. My new Boss is a bastard, too…… but at least

  I respect him.

  Most of the Senior Managers I knew gave automobile accident victims new hope for recovery. They walked, talked and performed rudimentary tasks, all without the benefit of a spine.

  Quote from the Administrator after overriding the decision of a Quality Assurance Break-Thru Team he created to find a solution to a problem:

  "I'm sorry if I ever gave you the impression your input would have any effect on my decision for the outcome of this project!"

更多 英語笑話英語小笑話英文笑話英語幽默小故事,請繼續(xù)關(guān)注 英語作文大全

英語 笑話
本文標(biāo)題:Fun at State Highway - 英語笑話_英文笑話_英語幽默小故事
本文地址:http://www.hengchuai.cn/writing/humor/40226.html

上一篇:好多人逆行 下一篇:Time Is Money

相關(guān)文章

  • 什么士兵?

    What soldiers? Wife: Dear! Take a look at those soldiers gawking at the lovely young girl passing by. Husband: Soldiers? What soldiers? 什么士兵? 妻子:親愛的!快看那些士兵,他們看經(jīng)過的那位漂亮女郎都看得發(fā)...

    2019-01-19 英語笑話
  • 趣味圖片英語笑話:Take it or leave it 要不接受要不放棄(雙語)
    趣味圖片英語笑話:Take it or leave it 要不接受要不放棄(雙語)

    Take it or leave it. I'm hungover and couldn't be bothered ...要不接受要不放棄。我心里難受,不能被打擾…… 更多 英語笑話、英語小笑話、英文笑話、英語幽默小故事...

    2018-11-06 英語笑話
  • 擇優(yōu)選擇“中心權(quán)力”討論會(huì)的主持--雙語幽默漫畫
    擇優(yōu)選擇“中心權(quán)力”討論會(huì)的主持--雙語幽默漫畫

    "i'd like you to lead a seminar on the power of focus."我想讓你主持“中心權(quán)力”的討論會(huì)。 更多 英語笑話 英語小笑話 英文笑話 英語幽默小故事 相關(guān)文章和資料,請繼續(xù)關(guān)注 英語...

    2018-10-30 英語笑話
  • 英語幽默 -First In Heaven

    Little Johnny was sitting in class one day. On this particular day, the teacher wanted to ask her class which part of the body went to heaven first. One little girl...

    2019-03-19 英語笑話
  • 如何檢驗(yàn)自我通道--雙語幽默漫畫
    如何檢驗(yàn)自我通道--雙語幽默漫畫

    "When my ego senses potential damage,the air bags are deployed!"當(dāng)我的自我測道潛在損壞時(shí),這些氣球就膨脹了。 更多 英語笑話 英語小笑話 英文笑話 英語幽默小故事 相關(guān)文章和資...

    2018-10-30 英語笑話
  • How to Make Everybody Happy?

    How to Make Everybody Happy? Peter's uncle live in the country. Once Peter went to stay with him for a few weeks.Whenever they went for a walk or for a drive in the car...

    2018-11-19 英語笑話
  • 霍恩·圖克

    Horne Tooke George Ⅲ asked the once wellknown wit, Horne Tooke,whether he could play cards. "Your Majesty," replied Tooke,"I am a mere childwhere cards are concerned. I cannot even tell a King from aKnave...

    2019-01-18 英語笑話
  • 每日一笑God and Grandma(8.21)

    God and Grandma Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to...

    2018-11-18 英語笑話
  • 英語幽默 - Team Spirit

    At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, "Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?" The little boy nodded in the affi...

    2019-03-19 英語笑話
  • 第1354期 英語笑話:脫口笑話精選 傷感

    周從脫口秀的篇幅明顯可以看出,莎拉·佩林辭職是個(gè)熱點(diǎn)。大部分的主持人都在說這件事,加上佩林說自己辭職是因?yàn)槊襟w的攻擊。"The Governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin, has announced she is...

    2018-11-27 英語笑話
你可能感興趣
主站蜘蛛池模板: 亚洲国产小视频 | 亚洲欧美国产精品 | 一级做a爰片久久毛片潮喷 一级做a爰片久久毛片美女 | 久久影视一区 | 国产美女拍拍拍在线观看 | 黄色网址在线免费观看 | 国产亚洲一区二区三区不卡 | 国产真实乱子伦精品视 | 在线看毛片网站 | caoporen国产91在线 | 黄色a三级免费看 | 深夜在线观看大尺度 | 欧美激情一级欧美精品 | 欧美特级午夜一区二区三区 | 国产中文久久精品 | 国产精品合集久久久久青苹果 | 国产成人久久综合二区 | 一区二区在线欧美日韩中文 | 97在线免费视频 | 国产精品18久久久久网站 | 亚洲精品一区二区三区五区 | 性生i活一级一片 | 女人张开腿给男人桶爽免费 | 特黄特色大片免费播放路01 | 欧美jizzhd精品欧美高清 | 成人在线毛片 | 成人亚洲精品777777 | 成人一级片 | 国产成人毛片视频不卡在线 | 国产一区二区三区免费视频 | 久国产| 一级久久 | 一级片网站在线观看 | 丁香婷婷影音先锋5566 | 一级做a爰片久久毛片16 | 国产欧美另类久久精品91 | 国产一区二区三区高清 | 996热这里有精品青青草原 | 日本一级高清不卡视频在线 | 国产黄色片在线观看 | 免费v片在线观看 |