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英文笑話:Liverpool FC

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  Joke:Liverpool FC What's long, scouse, and goes around corners? The dole queue.

  Why is the Anfield grass so green? Because every week they put millions of pounds worth of shit on it.

  Why did Gerard Houllier go to Argos? It's the only place he could pick up Premier points.

-------------------------

  Saint Peter was manning the Pearly Gates when forty scousers showed up. Never having seen anyone from Liverpool at heaven's door, Saint Peter said he would have to check with God. After hearing the news, God instructed him to admit the ten most virtuous from the group.

  A few minutes later, Saint Peter returned to God breathless and said, "They're gone."

  "What? All of the Scousers are gone?" asked God.

  "No" replied Saint Peter, "the Pearly Gates!"

--------------------------

  What do you say to a Scouser with a job? "Big Mac please."

  Why does the River Mersey run through Liverpool? Because if it walked, it would be mugged.

----------------------

  Man walks into a shop in Liverpool:

  Man: Can I have a pair of tights for my wife?

  Shop assistant: Certainly Sir, what size head are you?

------------------------------

  What do you call a Scouser in a suit? The accused.

  What do you call a Scouser in a three-bed semi? A burglar.

  What's the difference between a Scouser and a coconut? > One's thick and hairy, and the other's a coconut.

  Why is it bad luck to run over a scouser on a bike? It might be your bike.

  What is the difference between Paul Ince and an Airfix model kit without a tube of glue? One is a Gluless Kit……

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