英語幽默精讀【67】Long Life
A man was selling medicines at a fair. At first he sold bottles of a cure for colds for just a dollar a bottle.
Many people wanted to buy it and the man's young assistant moved quickly through the crowd collecting money and handing out bottles of the cold cure.
Then, when he had a big crowd, the man held up a very small bottle.
"And now, ladies and gentlemen, " he shouted. "here is the medicine you have been waiting for. The cure for old age. Drink just one bottle of this and you will live forever."
"And, ladies and gentlemen," the man continued, "I'm not going to charge you a hundred dollars a bottle for this wonderful medicine. I'm not going to charge you fifty dollars a bottle. I'm not going to charge you twenty five dollars a bottle. No, ladies and gentlemen, I'm going to charge you just ten dollars a bottle. Think, my friends, for ten dollars you can live forever."
Most of the people in the crowd did not believe this.
One person shouted, "if it will make you live forever, why don't you drink it?"
Then another person cried , "Yes, you look as if you're at least sixty years old. "
"Thank you, sir, thank you," the man replied, "I'm so glad you said that. My real age is three hundred and twenty nine. "
The crowd laughed at this but there were still a few people who wanted to believe the man. One of them spoke to the man's assistant as she passed by. "Is that true," he asked, "that he's three hundred and twenty-nine?"
“Don't ask me," the assistant said, "I've only worked for him for a hundred and fifty years."
※ Notes
（1） fair n.集市
（2） charge v.收錢；要價
（3） look as if看上去
※ Exercises
根據短文選擇正確答案：
① What did the man sell at first?
A. a cure for colds
B. empty bottles
C. a cure for old age
D. a medicine that made people live forever.
② Why didn't the people believe the man was selling medicine that could cure old age?
A. The medicine was too cheap.
B. The medicine was too expensive.
C. He looked quite old himself.
D. He didn't look honest.
③ How old did the man selling medicine say he was?
A. at least sixty
B. over three hundred
C. a hundred and fifty
D. he didn't say
④ How much did the man charge for the cure for old age?
A. one dollar a bottle
B. twenty-five dollars a bottle
C. ten dollars a bottle
D. fifty dollars a bottle
⑤ We can infer from the passage that_____ .
A. the man was very honest
B. the assistant was also very honest
C. the man was very stupid
D. neither the man nor the assistant was honest, for they were cheating people
※ 譯文
長生不老
一人在集市賣藥。起先他賣一美元一瓶的治感冒的藥。
很多人想買藥，那人的年輕助手迅速穿行于人群中，一邊收錢，一邊遞藥。
然后當圍觀的人多起來時，那人舉起一個小瓶子。
“聽著，女士們，先生們，”那人喊道，“這就是你們一直想要的藥。
消除衰老的藥。只吃一瓶，就會長生不老。“
“女士們，先生們，”那人接著說道，“對這種神奇的藥，我不打算賣一瓶100美元。我不打算賣一瓶50美元，我也不打算賣一瓶25美元。我只打算賣一瓶10美元。想想吧，朋友們，只花10美元，你們就能長生不老。”
人群中大多數人不相信他的話。
一人喊道：“如果這藥能使人長生不老，你為什么不吃？”
接著另一人叫道：“是哇，你看上去至少60歲。”
“謝謝，先生，謝謝，”那人回答，“我很高興你這么說。我的實際年齡是329歲。”
聽到他的話，人群中發出一陣笑聲，但仍有幾個人愿意相信他的話。其中一人當那個助手經過時問她，“他已329歲了，這是真的嗎？”他問。
“別問我，”助手說，“我只為他工作了150年。”
※ 練習參考答案
①A②C③B④C⑤D
幽默 英語本文地址：http://www.hengchuai.cn/writing/humor/89502.html
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