If I'd had my way，the story would have ended that day where it began――on the sixth hole at Stony Brook.

　　"What was that bawling？"my wife，Shirley，asked，in－terrupting me in mid－swing.Without another word she marched into a mucky undergrowth and re－emerged carrying something alive.

　　"Rrrit，rrit，rrit，"it screamed.

　　"It's an orphaned raccoon，"she said，gently stroking a mud－matted ball of gray fur.

　　"Its mother is probably ten yards away，has rabies and is about to attack，"I scolded.

　　"No，it's alone and starving――that's why the little thing is out of its nest.Here，take it，"she ordered."I think there' s another baby over there."

　　In a minute she returned with a squalling bookend――just as mud－encrusted2） and emaciated3） as the first.She wrapped the two complaining ingrates in her sweater.I knew that look.We were going to have two more mouths to feed.

　　"Just remember，"I declared，"they're your bundles to look after."But of all the family proclamations4） I have made over the years，none was wider of the mark.

　　When，like Shirley and me，you have four children，you don' t think much about empty nests.You don't think the noisy，exuberant procession of kids and their friends will ever end.But the bedrooms will someday empty，the hot bath water will miraculously return，and the sounds that make a family will echo only in the scrapbook of your mind.

　　Shirley and I had gone through the parting ritual with Laraine and Steve and Christopher.Now there was only Daniel，who was chafing to trade his room at home for a pad at Penn State.So I was looking forward to my share of a little peace and quiet――not raccoons.

　　"What do you feed baby raccoons？"I asked the game protector over the phone the next morning.We had cleaned them up，made them a bed in a box of rags，added a ticking clock in the hope it would calm them，found old baby bottles in the basement，fed them warm milk and got them to sleep，all without floorwalking the first night.

　　However，they revived and began their machine－gun chant shortly after Shirley had run out the door，heading for classes.In anticipation of a soon－to－be empty nest，she had gone back to college to get a master's degree so she could teach.

　　Meanwhile，I had my own work to do――various publishing projects that I handle from home.As the only child remaining with us，Daniel was m y potential raccoon－relief man.Or so I hoped.

　　"Whose bright idea was this？"he asked with the tart5） tongue of a teenager.

　　"Your mother thought you needed something more to earn your allowance，"I cracked."Will you heat some milk for them？"

　　"Sorry，I'm late for school，"he called over his shoulder.He and I were at that awkward testing stage，somewhere between my flagging authority and his rush for independence.

　　The major problem with trying to feed the raccoons was one of flow.Milk was flowing out of the bottle too fast and through the kits the same way.

　　"Thinner milk and less corn syrup，"the wildlife man suggested，adding that he would send along a brochure for raising them."The object，"he coached，"is to take care of them until they can go back to the woods and take care of themselves."

　　"I'll do anything I can to make that happen，"I assured him."They're about eight ounces each"――I had weighed them on my postage scale."They'll be old enough to be on their own in a couple more weeks，right？"

　　"Not quite，"he said."Come fall，if all goes well，they'll be ready."I'll strangle6） them before then，I said under my breath.I prepared a new formula7） and tried it on one.The kit coughed and sputtered like a clogged carbureter.The hole in the nipple was too big.Maybe I could feed them better with a doll's bottle，I concluded，and set out to find one.At a toy store，I found some miniature bottles，one of which was attached to a specially plumbed doll named Betsy Wetsy."My Betsys are wetsy enough，"I told the clerk――declining doll and diapers，but taking the bottle.Back home，I tried feeding the raccoons again.Miracle of miracles，they sucked contentedly and fell asleep.（Only twelve more weeks to September，I counted down.）During the next month and a half I functioned faithfully as day－care nanny for Bonnie and Clyde，named for their bandit－like masks.The kits apparently considered me their mother.When I held them at feeding time，they still spoke in the same scratchy8） voice，but now it was a contented hum.The only time they may have perceived me to be an impostor came when they climbed on my shoulders，parted my hair and pawed in vain for a nipple.Before long the kits graduated to cereal and bananas.When they became more active，our backyard birdbath became an instant attraction.Bonnie，the extrovert of the two，ladled the water worshipfully with her paws like a priest conducting a baptism.Clyde followed suit，but cautiously，as if the water might be combustible.Next Bonnie discovered the joy of food and water together，and thereafter every morsel had to be dipped before being eaten.

　　By July the kits weighed about three pounds.I built a screened－in cage and moved them outdoors.When they had adjusted well to their new quarters，Daniel suggested we free them to explore the woods and forage for food."I don't want them to get lost or hurt out there，"I said，sounding more like a mother hen than a surrogate father raccoon."They should get used to being on their own，"Daniel insisted.We left their door ajar9） so they could wander during the day.At night，we called them home by banging together their food bowls.They came out of the woods at a gallop10）。Still，I was afraid we might be rushing their initiation to the wild.One windy afternoon while Daniel and I were playing catch in the backyard，I spotted Bonnie，twenty feet off the ground，precariously tightrope－walking the bouncing branches of a mulberry tree.She had eaten her fill of berries and was trying to get down，or so I thought."Be careful，babe，"I called，running to the tree."Quick，Dan，get a ladder.""Let her go，"he said calmly."She's on an adventure.Don' t spoil her fun."And he was on the money.When I returned later，she was snoozing serenely in the mulberry' s cradling arms.However，the raccoons did get into trouble one night when they let themselves out of their cage with those dexterous forepaws.Shirley and I were awakened at 2A.M.by a horrendous scream."What was that？"I asked，bolting upright."The raccoons？"she wondered."They' re in trouble."Tossing off the covers，I grabbed a flashlight and ran outside in my skivvies.As I came around the south side of the house，I heard something rattle the eaves an d jump into the maple tree.Next，I got jumped.First by Bonnie，landing on my shoulder，then by her brother，shinnying up my leg.Circling my neck，they jabbered their excitement："Rrrrit，rrrit，rrrit.""It's okay，I've got ya，you' re safe，"I said，cuddling them in my arms.Apparently a wild raccoon，defending its territory，had attacked Clyde.He had a bloody shoulder that didn't appear serious；Bonnie was fine.

　　July gave way to August，and August to September.Soon the days were getting shorter，and the raccoons were six－pound butterballs.I was fascinated by their creativity and intelligence.One evening after I banged their food bowls together，there was no reply.W hen I reported anxiously at the breakfast table that they hadn't come in the night before，Daniel laughed at my concern."Now we'll see if you're as good a teacher as a mother raccoon.""I already know the answer，"I said."By the way，what time did you get in last night？""About midnight，"he answered."Your eyes say later.""I'm not a baby anymore，"he shot back.Outside，I beckoned the raccoons again，and this time they reported：effervescent Bonnie in a flat－out sprint，Clyde in a tagalong amble.

　　Near the end of September they were missing a week，and I suggested to Shirley that they were probably gone for good."You know it's a mistake trying to hold on to anything that no longer needs you，"she counseled."Who's holding on？"I protested.But when I continued scanning the woods，hoping to catch sight of them，I knew she was right.Reluctantly，I dismantled their pen，stored their bowls and put them out of my mind.Or tried to.But they had got more of a hold on my heart than I ever thought possible.What I had considered a nuisance had，in fact，been a gift；what I had labeled a burden，a blessing.Why is it，I asked myself，that with so many people and things，we only appreciate them fully after they' re gone？

　　One Saturday near the end of October，Shirley，Daniel and I were in the backyard raking leaves when I spotted a ringed tail beyond the gate that opens to the woods."Look，Shirley，"I whispered.And though I had no idea if it was one of ours，I called，"Bonnie.……Clyde."The magnificently marked animal rose on its hind legs and looked us over inquisitively.For a frozen moment，we faced off，statue like.Then I called again，and the animal moved in our direction.It was Bonnie，and we went to meet her.Kneeling，I held out my hand，which she licked while I rubbed her neck.She purred her most satisfied rrrit，rrrit，rrrit."Go get a banana for her，"I suggested to Daniel."No，it's time she made it on her own，"he replied firmly."She's a big girl now.Don't do anything for her that she can do for herself."I looked at Shirley and winked.Tall，broad－shouldered Daniel wasn't talking raccoons.He was talking parents.The object is to take care of them until they can take care of themselves，a haunting voice echoed.It was time to let go.After rubbing Bonnie' s neck one last time，I stepped back.She sensed my release and bounded off joyfully in the direction from which she had come."Have a good life，"I called after her.Then she dipped behind a tree and was gone.

　　by Fred Bauer

　　浣熊的夏天

　　如果當初照我說的辦，那天這個故事就會在原來開始的地方――石溪高爾夫球場第6洞宣告結束了。

　　我正要揮桿擊球時，我妻子雪莉問我："那是什么叫聲？"接著二話沒說，她跑進一處濕污的矮樹叢，再出來時手里抱著個活東西。

　　"吱，吱，吱，"那小東西尖叫著。

　　"是個浣熊孤兒，"雪莉邊說邊輕柔地撫摸著一團粘著泥的灰毛球。

　　我厲聲說道，"它媽媽可能就在10碼遠，也許有狂犬病，隨時會咬你。"

　　"不對，它孤零零的，而且在挨餓，所以它才離了窩。"她吩咐說，"嘿，拿著。我想那邊還有一只。"

　　不一會兒，雪莉抱著大聲尖叫像個書擋似的小浣熊回來，跟頭一只一樣一身泥漿硬殼而且瘦弱不堪。她把兩只不領情、發出怨聲的浣熊裹在絨衣里。我了解她臉上的表情。我們家又添了兩張嗷嗷待哺的嘴。

　　我嚴肅地說："照看它們可是你的職責。"不過這些年來我類似的鄭重聲明從沒兌現過。

　　如果你像我跟雪莉一樣，有4個孩子，你就不大會想到孩子們長大離家后的空巢，也不會想到家里有一天不再有熙熙攘攘、活蹦亂跳的幾個孩子和他們的朋友。可是臥室終究會空閑，熱洗澡水將奇跡般地又來到你身旁，溫馨的天倫之樂只有在記憶中回蕩。

　　我和雪莉已經有過跟女兒萊賴恩、兒子史蒂夫和克里斯托弗告別的經歷。現在只剩下丹尼爾，不過他也迫不及待地要住進賓夕法尼亞州立大學的宿舍。所以我在期待著我應享有的一點寧靜，而不是浣熊。

　　第二天早上我打電話給從事動物保護工作的人，問該給幼小浣熊喂什么。我和雪莉把它們洗干凈，在一盒布頭里做了個床，還放了個嘀嗒作響的鐘，希望它能使它們平靜，從地下室找出舊奶瓶，喂它們溫牛奶。它們總算睡著了。頭一個晚上沒有像哄嬰兒似地抱著它們走來走去。

　　可是雪莉走出門去上課不久，兩個小家伙就活了起來，開始像機關槍似地吟叫。雪莉考慮到家里不久就將變成空巢，又回大學攻讀碩士學位，為的是以后可以教書。

　　可是我也有自己的工作要干，在家里處理各種出版事務。作為惟一剩下的孩子，丹尼爾是幫助我解脫撫養浣熊任務的人。至少我是這么盤算的。

　　"這是誰的好主意？"丹尼爾用未成年人尖酸刻薄的口吻問道。

　　"你媽媽認為你需要干更多的事才能得到你的零花錢，"我俏皮地回答他。"你給它們熱點兒奶好嗎？"

　　"抱歉，我上學都晚了。"他頭也沒回就出了門。我和丹尼爾正經受著窘迫的父子關系考驗階段――我的權威日益削弱，而他卻急于獨立生活。

　　"流速"成為喂養浣熊的主要問題。牛奶流出奶瓶和從浣熊體內排出的速度都太快。

　　野生動物工作人員建議說："喂稀點兒的奶，少喝玉米糊。"還說要寄一本有關喂養浣熊的小冊子給我。他叮囑說："目的是照顧好它們，直到它們能夠回到樹林里去獨立生活。"

　　我向他保證說："我會竭盡全力讓它們回歸自然。它們已經有8盎司重了。"我曾用郵件秤秤過。"再過幾個星期它們就能獨立生活了，是嗎？"

　　他說："不完全這樣。到了秋天，如果一切正常，那就差不多了。"我壓低嗓門說，到那之前我會把它們掐死的。我準備了新的食譜，先喂一只熊。那幼熊像堵塞的化油器那樣，又咳嗽又飛濺吐沫。原來是奶瓶的嘴太大了。我得出結論，也許用玩具娃娃的奶瓶更好些。我就出門去找。在一家玩具店發現一些小奶瓶。其中一個掛在裝有特殊管道取名"尿濕貝齊"的娃娃身上。我告訴店員，"我那倆娃娃已經夠濕的了。"我沒要娃娃和尿布，只買了奶瓶。回家以后我又試著給浣熊喂奶。真是奇跡，它們滿意地吮奶，然后就睡著了。我倒計著時間，到9月只有12個星期了。以后的一個半月里，我忠實地做著邦妮和克萊德的日間保姆。之所以用著名大盜的名字，因為它們的臉像他們。兩個小家伙顯然把我看作是它們的媽媽。我抱著它們喂奶時，那尖聲的吟叫，現在已經變成心滿意足的哼哼了。惟一發現我不是它們的媽媽的時候，是它們爬上我的肩膀，用爪子扒開頭發卻找不到奶頭。沒多久兩只幼熊可以吃麥片粥和香蕉了。等到它們更喜歡活動時，我們家后院的鳥浴池立即吸引了它們的注意。性格外向的邦妮尊崇地用爪子舀水，像是牧師主持洗禮儀式。克萊德也照著這個樣子學，不過是小心翼翼地，似乎生怕水會引起燃燒。后來邦妮發現食物和水一起享用的歡樂，從此每吃一口之前先沾沾水。

　　到了7月小浣熊體重大約3磅了。我做了個帶網的籠子，把它們搬到屋外。它們適應了新住處以后，丹尼爾建議放它們出去到林子里找吃的。我說："我不想讓它們迷路或受到傷害。"聽上去我更像母親，而不是浣熊的代理父親。丹尼爾堅持說道："它們應該習慣獨立生活。"我們讓籠子門半開著，這樣白天它們可以出來逛逛。晚上我們敲響食碗，小熊飛快地從林子里竄出來。可我還是擔心我們在過急地要它們適應野外生活。一個刮風天的下午，我跟丹尼爾在后花園練接棒球。我發現邦妮離地20英尺，小心謹慎地在上下晃動的桑樹樹枝上像走鋼絲那樣地往下走。她吃飽了漿果，正想下來。至少我是這么想的。"留神，孩子。"我叫著并朝桑樹跑去。"快，丹尼爾，拿梯子。""甭管她，"他平靜地說。"她在嘗試冒險的樂趣。別打攪她。"丹尼爾說得一點沒錯。等我稍后回來時，邦妮正安詳地躺在催眠的桑樹樹枝上。可是，有一天晚上小浣熊們真的遇上了麻煩。它們借助兩只靈巧的前爪自己溜出了籠子。我和雪莉半夜兩點給一聲可怕的尖叫驚醒了。"那是什么？"我猛地一下坐直了。"是浣熊嗎？"雪莉沒把握地問道。"它們碰到麻煩了。"我掀開被子，抄起電筒，穿著短袖內衣跑了出去。我繞到了房子南側，聽到有什么使屋檐咯咯作響，然后又跳上楓樹。接著有東西跳到我身上。先是邦妮跳到我肩膀上，接著是她弟弟順著我的腿往上爬。圍著我脖子，激動得使勁吱吱叫。"沒事了，有我在，沒有危險了。"我雙臂摟著兩只浣熊。顯然有只野生浣熊為了保衛自己的地盤，向克萊德發動了進攻。它肩膀上流著血，但不嚴重；邦妮安然無恙。

　　7月、8月相繼過去，到了9月。白天越來越短，兩只浣熊已經是6磅重的小胖子了。它們的創造力和智慧令我吃驚。一天晚上，我敲打食碗以后，沒有任何動靜。第二天吃早餐時，我在餐桌上焦急地告訴雪莉和丹尼爾說昨天晚上它們沒有回來。丹尼爾對我的關切很不以為然地取笑道："你是個稱職的老師，這回我們倒要看看你是否也是個稱職的浣熊媽媽。""我已經知道答案了，"我說。"對了，昨天晚上你什么時候回家的？""差不多半夜了，"丹尼爾回答說。"可你的眼睛卻告訴我比半夜還晚。""我已經不是嬰兒了，"他反駁道。我出屋再次誘使浣熊回來，這回有反應了。興奮的邦妮全速奔跑過來，克萊德慢慢追隨在后。

　　9月底它們有一個星期沒露面。我對雪莉說這回可能就一去不復返了。她勸我說，"你要知道，一旦它們不需要你時，還硬要留它們就錯了。""誰留了？"我不服地反駁道。可是等我繼續在樹林里找，希望能看見它們的時候，我意識到雪莉說對了。我不情愿地拆了它們的窩，存放了食碗，不再把那兩只小熊掛在心上了，或者說我試圖這么做。但是它們在我心中的地位遠比我想像的重要。我曾經認為是惱人的動物，事實上成了一件禮物；我曾當作是累贅的東西，卻成了一種福分。我自問道，世上有那么多人和物，為什么只有當失去他們的時候才能充分理解他們的重要呢？

　　快到10月底的一個星期六，我們三人正在后花園耙樹葉，我發現通往樹林的門外邊有個帶圈的尾巴。"雪莉，瞧。"我輕聲說道。雖然我沒把握是不是我們撫養的兩只浣熊中的一個，我還是叫出聲來，"邦妮……克萊德。"那有著顯眼條紋的動物伸直后腿，好奇地瞧著我們。有片刻誰也沒動彈。我們愣在那兒，盯著它看。我再次叫了起來，那動物朝我們走來。沒錯是邦妮，我們往前走去歡迎它。我跪下，伸出手，摸她脖子，她舔我的手。邦妮呼嚕呼嚕發出心滿意足的聲音。"去給她拿根香蕉來，"我給丹尼爾出主意說。"不，已經是她自己獨立生活的時候了，"丹尼爾堅定地回答。"她已經是個大姑娘了。不要替她做她自己能做的事。"我瞧著雪莉，眨了眨眼。肩寬體高的丹尼爾不是在說浣熊，而是在議論父母。"目的是照顧好它們，直到它們能夠獨立生活"，這耐人尋味的話縈繞在我心頭。到了讓孩子自己去闖的時候了。我最后又摸了摸邦妮的脖子，身子往后退去。她意識到我是讓她走開，就高興地朝來的方向蹦跳而去。我在她身后嚷道，"祝你生活幸福。"邦妮竄到樹后就消失了。

　　注釋：

　　raccoon n. <美>浣熊

　　mud-encrusted adj. 泥漿硬殼

　　emaciated adj. 瘦弱的， 衰弱的

　　proclamation n. 宣布

　　tart adj. 尖酸的， 刻薄的

　　strangle v. 扼死

　　formula n. 公式， 規則， 客套語

　　scratchy adj. 潦草的， 凌亂的

　　ajar adj. （門窗等） 微開的

　　gallop n. 疾馳， 飛奔

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