提升個人自信的25種方法
1. Groom yourself. 裝扮自己。
This seems like such an obvious one, but it's amazing how much of a difference a shower and a shave can make in your feelings of self-confidence and for your self-image. There have been days when I turned my mood around completely with this one little thing.
這似乎看上去顯而易見了,但洗澡或是剃胡須后給你自我感覺上帶來的自信和自我形象上的改進(jìn)卻是很神奇的。一直以來,你就是通過這樣一件小小的事情來徹底的改變自己的情緒。
2. Dress nicely. 穿戴好些。
A corollary of the first item above … if you dress nicely, you'll feel good about yourself. You'll feel successful and presentable and ready to tackle the world. Now, dressing nicely means something different for everyone … it doesn't necessarily mean wearing a $500 outfit, but could mean casual clothes that are nice looking and presentable.
這是上面一條必然產(chǎn)生的結(jié)果……如果你穿戴好些,你的自我感覺會很好,你會覺得自己很成功,很得體,已經(jīng)準(zhǔn)備好來應(yīng)對這個世界。這里,穿戴好對于每個人來說是不一樣的…你不必穿500美元一套的衣服,但可以穿很好看也很得體的休閑服飾。
3. Photoshop your self-image. 修改你的自我形象。
Our self-image means so much to us, more than we often realize. We have a mental picture of ourselves, and it determines how confident we are in ourselves. But this picture isn't fixed and immutable. You can change it. Use your mental Photoshopping skills, and work on your self-image. If it's not a very good one, change it. Figure out why you see yourself that way, and find a way to fix it.
自我形象對于我們來說意義重大,比我們認(rèn)為的重要得多。我們在腦海里都有一個自我形象,它決定了我們自信的程度。但這個形象不是固定改變的,你可以改變它的。多使用你的腦海中的圖像修改功能,用在你的自我形象上。如果你腦海中的自我形象不是很好,就修改一下吧。找到為什么你那樣看待自己,并找個方法解決它。
4. Think positive. 積極思考。
One of the things I learned when I started running, about two years ago, what how to replace negative thoughts (see next item) with positive ones. How I can actually change my thoughts, and by doing so make great things happened. With this tiny little skill, I was able to train for and run a marathon within a year. It sounds so trite, so Norman Vincent Peale, but my goodness this works. Seriously. Try it if you haven't.
二年前,當(dāng)我學(xué)習(xí)跑步時,我學(xué)到的一件事情是如何用積極的想法來取代消極的想法(見下一條)。如何通過這樣改變自己的想法來使好的事情發(fā)生。就是使用這樣一個小小的技藝,我在不到一年訓(xùn)練后就能跑馬拉松。這聽起來是如此陳腐,和諾曼.文森特.皮爾一樣。但謝天謝地它很有效。真的,如果你還沒有試過的話,不妨試一試。
5. Kill negative thoughts. 去除消極的想法。
Goes hand-in-hand with the above item, but it's so important that I made it a separate item. You have to learn to be aware of your self-talk, the thoughts you have about yourself and what you're doing. When I was running, sometimes my mind would start to say, “This is too hard. I want to stop and go watch TV.” Well, I soon learned to recognize this negative self-talk, and soon I learned a trick that changed everything in my life: I would imagine that a negative thought was a bug, and I would vigilantly be on the lookout for these bugs. When I caught one, I would stomp on it (mentally of course) and squash it. Kill it dead. Then replace it with a positive one. (“Come on, I can do this! Only one mile left!”)
這一條與上一條是連在一起的,但因為它如此重要,我把它作為單獨一項列出來。你必須清楚自己內(nèi)心的想法,清楚你自己是誰和你在干什么。當(dāng)我在跑步里,有時我腦海里開始講:“這太難了,我想停下來,去看電視。”當(dāng)然,我很快就學(xué)會分辨這種內(nèi)心消極的想法,并學(xué)會那個可以改變生活中一切的小竅門:我會想象消極的想法就是一個小臭蟲,我會非常警惕的搜查這引起小臭蟲。當(dāng)我抓住一個,我就狠狠跺幾腳(當(dāng)然指精神上的),然后捏碎,殺死它。然后用積極的想法取代它。(“ 加油,我可能做到的,不過只剩一里而已”)
Know yourself and you will win all battles. - Sun Tzu
知己知彼,百戰(zhàn)不殆。-孫子
6. Get to know yourself. 了解你自己。
When going into battle, the wisest general learns to know his enemy very, very well. You can't defeat the enemy without knowing him. And when you're trying to overcome a negative self-image and replace it with self-confidence, your enemy is yourself. Get to know yourself well. Start listening to your thoughts. Start writing a journal about yourself, and about the thoughts you have about yourself, and analyzing why you have such negative thoughts. And then think about the good things about yourself, the things you can do well, the things you like. Start thinking about your limitations, and whether they're real limitations or just ones you've allowed to be placed there, artificially. Dig deep within yourself, and you'll come out (eventually) with even greater self-confidence.
在要打仗前,最聰明的將軍會將敵人了解得一清二楚。如果你不了解你的敵人,你是無法戰(zhàn)勝它的。當(dāng)你試圖戰(zhàn)勝消極的個人形象,變得自信些話,你的敵人就是你自己。好好了解你知道,開始聆聽你的想法,開始編寫關(guān)于自己和自己想法的日志,分析你產(chǎn)生這些消極的想法。然后想想關(guān)于自己的好的方面,那些你可以做得很好的并且喜歡的事情。開始想想什么你的局限性,并弄清楚是否是真的局限了你,還僅僅是你允許擺放在那里虛假障礙。深深的挖掘自己的想法,最終你會更加自信。
7. Act positive. 積極行動。
More than just thinking positive, you have to put it into action. Action, actually, is the key to developing self-confidence. It's one thing to learn to think positive, but when you start acting on it, you change yourself, one action at a time. You are what you do, and so if you change what you do, you change what you are. Act in a positive way, take action instead of telling yourself you can't, be positive. Talk to people in a positive way, put energy into your actions. You'll soon start to notice a difference.
除了要積極思考,你還要付諸行動,事實上,這是發(fā)展個人自信的關(guān)鍵。積極思考是一回事,當(dāng)你開始行動時,你又改變了,所以一次做好一件事情。你所做事情決定了你,當(dāng)你改變你所做時,你就改變了你自己。用積極方式行動,采取措施而不是僅僅告訴自己你不行,積極一些。用積極的方式與人交談,精力充沛的行動。要不了多久,你就會發(fā)現(xiàn)自己的改變。
8. Be kind and generous. 友好且慷慨。
Oh, so corny. If this is too corny for you, move on. But for the rest of you, know that being kind to others, and generous with yourself and your time and what you have, is a tremendous way to improve your self-image. You act in accordance with the Golden Rule, and you start to feel good about yourself, and to think that you are a good person. It does wonders for your self-confidence, believe me.
噢,太老土了。如果這對你來說太老土的話,繼續(xù)前進(jìn)。但你應(yīng)該知道,對別人友好,慷慨于你自己、你的時間和你所擁有的,是改善你自我形象的非常好的方法。你遵從黃金準(zhǔn)則行事,你將自我感覺良好,認(rèn)為自己是個很好的人。相信我,它會對你的自信產(chǎn)生奇跡般的效果的。
One important key to success is self-confidence. A key to self-confidence is preparation. - Arthur Ashe
成功的關(guān)鍵是自信,自信的關(guān)鍵是有所準(zhǔn)備。——阿瑟·阿什
9. Get prepared. 時刻準(zhǔn)備好。
It's hard to be confident in yourself if you don't think you'll do well at something. Beat that feeling by preparing yourself as much as possible. Think about taking an exam: if you haven't studied, you won't have much confidence in your abilities to do well on the exam. But if you studied your butt off, you're prepared, and you'll be much more confident. Now think of life as your exam, and prepare yourself.
如果你不知道你會做好某件事,那么自信會很困難。盡可能把自己準(zhǔn)備好,來擊退不自信的想法。想想正在考試:如果你沒有學(xué)習(xí),你會不相信自己有能力考好試。但如果你學(xué)好了,準(zhǔn)備好了,你就會有信心多了。現(xiàn)在,你把生命當(dāng)作考試,準(zhǔn)備好你自己。
10. Know your principles and live them. 明白自己的原則,并實踐它們。
What are the principles upon which your life is built? If you don't know, you will have trouble, because your life will feel directionless. For myself, I try to live the Golden Rule (and fail often). This is my key principle, and I try to live my life in accordance with it. I have others, but they are mostly in some way related to this rule (the major exception being to “Live my Passion”). Think about your principles … you might have them but perhaps you haven't given them much thought. Now think about whether you actually live these principles, or if you just believe in them but don't act on them.
你的生活是建立在怎樣的原則之上的?如果你不知道,就會比較麻煩,因為你的生將活毫無方向感而言。對于我自己,我一直遵從黃金準(zhǔn)則(常常失敗)。它是我最基本的原則,我試圖遵從黃金準(zhǔn)則來生活。我也有其它的原則,但大部分都和黃金準(zhǔn)則有關(guān)的(“充滿激情的生活”例外)。多想想你的原則……你可能有這些原則,但很少去思考它們。現(xiàn)在想想你是否遵守這些原則,還是僅僅相信它們,卻很少采取行動。
11. Speak slowly. 說話慢些。
Such a simple thing, but it can have a big difference in how others perceive you. A person in authority, with authority, speaks slowly. It shows confidence. A person who feels that he isn't worth listening to will speak quickly, because he doesn't want to keep others waiting on something not worthy of listening to. Even if you don't feel the confidence of someone who speaks slowly, try doing it a few times. It will make you feel more confident. Of course, don't take it to an extreme, but just don't sound rushed either.
很簡單的事情,但對于別人如何理解你時,就有很大的區(qū)別了。領(lǐng)導(dǎo)和有權(quán)威的人說話比較慢,這顯示出一種自信。那些覺得自己的話不值得聽的人說話會很快,因為他們不想讓別人等著聽些沒有價值的東西。即使你沒有覺得那些說話慢的人自信,你也試幾次,它會讓人更加自信。當(dāng)然也不要說得過慢,只要不像是在急沖沖的毫無考慮地說話就可以了。
12. Stand tall. 昂首站著。
I have horrible posture, so it will sound hypocritical for me to give this advice, but I know it works because I try it often. When I remind myself to stand tall and straight, I feel better about myself. I imagine that a rope is pulling the top of my head toward the sky, and the rest of my body straightens accordingly. As an aside, people who stand tall and confident are more attractive. That's a good thing any day, in my book.
我的站姿很難看,所以我給這種建設(shè)顯得有些假惺惺日,但我知道它對增強(qiáng)自信有作用,我常常嘗試。當(dāng)我告訴自己站得直直的,昂起頭來,自我感覺會好很多。我想象有一根繩子把我的頭往上吊著,我身體的其它部分就跟著直了起來。另外,昂首挺胸站著的人更迷人。在我的書里,這無論在什么時候都一件好事情。
13. Increase competence. 增強(qiáng)能力。
How do you feel more competent? By becoming more competent. And how do you do that? By studying and practicing. Just do small bits at a time. If you want to be a more competent writer, for example, don't try to tackle the entire profession of writing all at once. Just begin to write more. Journal, blog, write short stories, do some freelance writing. The more you write, the better you'll be. Set aside 30 minutes a day to write (for example), and the practice will increase your competence.
如何才能讓覺得自己能干呢?變得更能干。如何才能做到那一點?每次一點點,不繼的學(xué)習(xí)和練習(xí)。比如,如果你想成為一個出色的作家,不要一次性就想全面應(yīng)對那些專業(yè)寫作問題,只要多寫一點,多在雜志、博客上寫些短小的故事,自由寫作。你寫得越多,就會寫得越好。比如,每天花30分鐘去寫作,這種練習(xí)會不斷增加你的能力。
14. Set a small goal and achieve it. 設(shè)定小的目標(biāo),然后去實現(xiàn)它。
People often make the mistake of shooting for the moon, and then when they fail, they get discouraged. Instead, shoot for something much more achievable. Set a goal you know you can achieve, and then achieve it. You'll feel good about that. Now set another small goal and achieve that. The more you achieve small goals, the better you'll be at it, and the better you'll feel. Soon you'll be setting bigger (but still achievable) goals and achieving those too.
人們總是想飛向月球,當(dāng)他們失敗后,就會感覺到挫折,人們在這里犯了個錯誤。相反的,人們應(yīng)該爭取那些更容易完成的事情。設(shè)定一個你知道你可以完成的目標(biāo),然后完成它,你會因此感覺良好。接著設(shè)定另一個小目標(biāo)并完成它。你完成的小目標(biāo)越多,你在這方面就越強(qiáng),你的感覺也會越好。后來,你會設(shè)定更大的目標(biāo)(但仍是可以達(dá)到的)并去達(dá)到它們。
15. Change a small habit. 改變一點小習(xí)慣。
Not a big one, like quitting smoking. Just a small one, like writing things down. Or waking up 10 minutes earlier. Or drinking a glass of water when you wake up. Something small that you know you can do. Do it for a month. When you've accomplished it, you'll feel like a million bucks.
并不是說像戒煙這樣大的改變,只是一些小小的改變,像記下一些事情,或是每天提前十分鐘起床,或是早晨起來時喝一杯水,諸如此類的一些你知道你可能做到的一些小事情。堅持一個月,當(dāng)你完成的時候,就會仿佛贏了一百萬美元般高興。
16. Focus on solutions. 專注于解決問題。
If you are a complainer, or focus on problems, change your focus now. Focusing on solutions instead of problems is one of the best things you can do for your confidence and your career. “I'm fat and lazy!” So how can you solve that? “But I can't motivate myself!” So how can you solve that? “But I have no energy!” So what's the solution?
如果你是一個愛抱怨的人,或者總是想著問題的人,那么現(xiàn)在改變你的注意力。專注于解決問題而不是問題本身,這是能夠增加自信和發(fā)展事業(yè)的最好辦法。“我很胖,而且又懶。”那么你怎樣才能解決呢?“我不能激勵我自己!”那么你怎樣才能解決它呢?“我沒有精力!“那么你怎樣才能解決呢?
17. Smile. 微笑。
Another trite one. But it works. I feel instantly better when I smile, and it helps me to be kinder to others as well. A little tiny thing that can have a chain reaction. Not a bad investment of your time and energy.
另一個陳腐的方法,卻很有效。當(dāng)我微笑時,我立即感覺好多了,也可以讓我對別人更友善些。一些小事情之間有著連鎖反應(yīng),對你的時間和精力來說都是有好處的。
18. Volunteer. 參加志愿活動。
Related to the “be kind and generous” item above, but more specific. It's the holiday season right now … can you find the time to volunteer for a good cause, to spread some holiday cheer, to make the lives of others better? It'll be some of the best time you've ever spent, and an amazing side benefit is that you'll feel better about yourself, instantly.
和前面“友好且慷慨”那一項聯(lián)系起來,但更針對性。現(xiàn)在是假日季節(jié)了…你可以花時間為好的事業(yè)做些志愿活動,灑播些節(jié)日的快樂,讓他人的生活更加美好嗎?那將是你最好的時光,產(chǎn)生的神奇的效果會立即讓你自我感覺良好。
19. Be grateful. 懷著感恩的心。
I'm a firm believer in gratitude, as anyone who's been reading this blog for very long knows well. But I put it here because while being grateful for what you have in life, for what others have given you, is a very humbling activity … it can also be a very positive and rewarding activity that will improve your self-image. Read more.
我深信人應(yīng)懷有感恩的,只要是長期看我博客的人都知道的。我把它寫在這里的原因是,感激你現(xiàn)在所在的一切,感激別人給予你的一切,是一件非常謙遜的事情…這也是非常積極而有益的,它可以改變你的自我形象。閱讀更多。
20. Exercise. 多鍛煉。
Gosh, I seem to put this one on almost every list. But if I left it off this list I would be doing you a disservice. Exercise has been one of my most empowering activities in the last couple years, and it has made me feel so much better about myself.
天啊,我?guī)缀醢堰@個列在每個單子上,但如果我把它從單子就去除,又好像在做一件傷害你的事情。鍛煉身體成了我?guī)啄陙砀械骄Τ渑娴氖虑椋惨恢弊屛腋杏X良好。
All you have to do is take a walk a few times a week, and you'll see benefits. Start the habit.
你只需要一周出去小跑幾次,你就會收獲其中的益處,開始這種習(xí)慣吧。
21. Empower yourself with knowledge. 用知識武裝自己。
Empowering yourself, in general, is one of the best strategies for building self-confidence. You can do that in many ways, but one of the surest ways to empower yourself is through knowledge. This is along the same vein as building competence and getting prepared … by becoming more knowledgeable, you'll be more confident … and you become more knowledgeable by doing research and studying. The Internet is a great tool, of course, but so are the people around you, people who have done what you want, books, magazines, and educational institutions.
一般來講,讓自己更強(qiáng)大是建立自信的最好方式。你可以采取很多方式來武裝自己,但最好的方式是通過掌握知識。增長才干和時刻準(zhǔn)備著是同一條思路…變得越來越有見識,你會更加有信心…你能通研究和學(xué)習(xí)變得更有見識。互聯(lián)網(wǎng)是一個很棒的工具,當(dāng)然,也有你的周圍也有很多人,他們以前做過你想要做的事情,書籍,雜志和教育機(jī)構(gòu)也是你可以利用的。
22. Do something you've been procrastinating on. 做那些你一直拖延的事情。
What's on your to-do list that's been sitting there? Do it first thing in the morning, and get it out of the way. You'll feel great about yourself.
什么事情一直在你要去做的事情的表單上呢?那么在早晨首先完成,解決掉,你將感覺良好的。
23. Get active. 活躍起來。
Doing something is almost always better than not doing anything. Of course, doing something could lead to mistakes … but mistakes are a part of life. It's how we learn. Without mistakes, we'd never get better. So don't worry about those. Just do something. Get off your butt and get active — physically, or active by taking steps to accomplish something.
做點事情總是比什么都不做要好。當(dāng)然,做事情就可以犯錯誤…但犯錯也是我們生活的一部分,這是我們學(xué)習(xí)的方式。不犯錯誤,我們就無法進(jìn)步,所以不要再擔(dān)心犯錯誤,去做些事情就好了。站起來,活躍起來…從行動上,或者采取步驟去完成什么事情。
24. Work on small things. 做些小事情。
Trying to take on a huge project or task can be overwhelming and daunting and intimidating for anyone, even the best of us. Instead, learn to break off small chunks and work in bursts. Small little achievements make you feel good, and they add up to big achievements. Learn to work like this all the time, and soon you'll be a self-confident maniac.
每個人都害怕和畏懼去做一個巨大的工程或承擔(dān)重要任務(wù),即使最出色的人都如此。相反,我們要學(xué)會把這些大塊事情打碎,一小點一小點的完成。小的成就會讓你感覺良好,累積起來就是一個大的成就。一直要學(xué)著這樣工作,不用多久,你就會變成非常自信的狂人。
25. Clear your desk. 清理你的桌面。
This might seem like a small, simple thing (then again, for some of you it might not be so small). But it has always worked wonders for me. If my desk starts to get messy, and the world around me is in chaos, clearing off my desk is my way of getting a little piece of my life under control. It is the calm in the center of the storm around me. Here's how.
這可能看上去是一件非常簡單的小事(再整理一次對有些人來說可能就不是那么小的事情了)。它總能給我?guī)眢@奇的效果。如果我的桌子變得亂七八糟,我所在世界也仿佛雜亂無章。清理我的桌面是我控制我生活的點滴的方法。這里是如何去做。
Somehow I can't believe that there are any heights that can't be scaled by a man who knows the secrets of making dreams come true. This special secret, it seems to me, can be summarized in four C s. They are curiosity, confidence, courage, and constancy, and the greatest of all is confidence. When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and unquestionable. - Walt Disney
有時我會想,什么樣的高度會嚇退那些懂得如何將夢想成真的訣竅的人呢。對我來講,這些特別的訣竅可以總結(jié)為四個C,他們是curiosity(好奇心),confidence(自信),courage(勇氣),and constancy(堅持),它們中,最重要的是confidence(自信)。當(dāng)你相信一件事情時,完完全全的相信它,直接的,毫無疑問的相信。——沃樂特·迪士尼
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