笑話3則 THREE JOKES

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1.Count to one Hundred Before You Speak In class,the teacher,with his back leaning against the stove,said to the students,"Before you speak,you should think and count to at least 50,and for important matters to 100." No sooner had the teacher stopped talking than the students began to count. at last all the students shouted together,"1...98,99,100.teacher,your clothes are on fire." 數到一百再說課堂上，老師背靠火爐站著，對學生們說：“說話前要三思，起碼數到50，重要的事情要數到一百。” 老師的話音剛落，學生立刻從“1”開始數起來。最后一起喊：“98，99，100！老師，您的衣服著火了。”2.The Advantage of Alcohol In order to prove the harmful effect of alcohol,the teacher put a bug into a glass filled with alcohol,soon the bug died. The teacher asked a student,"what does this show?" The student answered,"It shows that people won't get parasites if they drink more alcohol." 酒的好處為了證明酒精對生物的危害，老師把一只蟲子放入裝有酒精的杯子里，蟲子很快就死了。老師問一個學生：“這說明了什么？” 學生答道：“說明人多喝酒，就不會長蟲子。”3.Exchange the Tortoise for the Wolf Teacher:Some students are becoming arrogant.Do you remember the story about race between the hare and the tortoise?Now,Xiaoming,will you please tell us why the hare was defeated by the tortoise? Xiaoming:Because the hare fell asleep. Teacher:Absolutely right!What should we do so that the hare won't fall asleep? Xiaoming:Exchange the tortoise for the wolf. 把烏龜換成狼老師：有些同學開始驕傲了，大家還記得龜兔賽跑的故事嗎。小明，你說說看，兔子為什么輸給烏龜？小明：因為它睡覺了。老師：對極了！我們應該怎么做才能讓兔子不睡覺呢？小明：把烏龜換成狼！

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