馴悍有方
A man was talking to his friend about how he hated to go home after a late card game.
“You wouldn't believe what I go through to avoid waking my wife，” he said. “First， I kill the engine a block from the house and coast into garage. Then I open the door slowly. Next I take off my shoes and tiptoe into our room. But just as I'm about to slide into bed， she always wakes up and gives me a hell.”
“I make a big racket when I go home，” his friend said.
“You do？”
“Sure. I honk the hone， slam the door， turn on all the lights， stomp up the bedroom and give my wife a big kiss， 'Hi， Alice，' I say， 'How about a little smooch for your old man？'”
“And what does she say？” his friend asked him in disbelief.
“She doesn't say anything，” his buddy replied. “She always pretends she's asleep.”
男士們正在向他的朋友講述他打牌打晚了是如何害怕回家。
“你肯定不能相信因?yàn)榕鲁承哑拮樱也扇×耸裁崔k法。”他說，“首先，在離家還有一個(gè)街區(qū)的時(shí)候，我就把發(fā)動機(jī)熄了火，靠慣性將車開進(jìn)車庫。然后我慢慢地打開房門，緊接著我脫掉鞋子，輕手輕腳地走進(jìn)臥室。可就在我要溜進(jìn)被窩時(shí)，她總會醒來，把我罵個(gè)狗血淋頭。”
“我回家時(shí)該吵就吵，該鬧就鬧。”他的朋友說。
“是嗎？”
“當(dāng)然啦。我把喇叭按得嘟嘟響，把門關(guān)得砰砰響，把燈全部打開，咚咚地走進(jìn)臥室，再重重地吻妻子一下。'喂，愛麗絲，'我說，'親親你老公，怎么樣？'”
“她怎么說？”他的朋友不相信地問道。
“她什么也不說，”他的伙伴說：“她總是假裝睡著了。”
幽默 笑話本文地址：http://www.hengchuai.cn/writing/humor/47103.html
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