Solitude2
Yet I experienced sometimes that the most sweet and tender, the most innocent and encouraging society may be found in any natural object, even for the poor misanthrope and most melancholy man. There can be no very black melancholy to him who lives in the midst of Nature and has his senses still. There was never yet such a storm but it was AEolian music to a healthy and innocent ear. Nothing can rightly compel a simple and brave man to a vulgar sadness. While I enjoy the friendship of the seasons I trust that nothing can make life a burden to me. The gentle rain which waters my beans and keeps me in the house today is not drear and melancholy, but good for me too. Though it prevents my hoeing them,it is of far more worth than my hoeing. If it should continue so long as to cause the seeds to rot in the ground and destroy the potatoes in the low lands, it would still be good for the grass on the uplands, and, being good for the grass, it would be good for me. Sometimes, when I compare myself with other men, it seems as if I were more favored by the gods than they, beyond any deserts that I am conscious of; as if I had a warrant and surety at their hands which my fellows have not, and were especially guided and guarded. I do not flatter myself, but if it be possible they flatter me. I have never felt lonesome, or in the least oppressed by a sense of solitude, but once, and that was a few weeks after I came to the woods, when, for an hour, I doubted if the near neighborhood of man was not essential to a serene and healthy life. To be alone was something unpleasant. But I was at the same time conscious of a slight insanity in my mood, and seemed to foresee my recovery. In the midst of a gentle rain while these thoughts prevailed, I was suddenly sensible of such sweet and beneficent society in Nature, in the very pattering of the drops, and in every sound and sight around my house, an infinite and unaccountable friendliness all at once like an atmosphere sustaining me, as made the fancied advantages of human neighborhood insignificant, and I have never thought of them since. Every little pine needle expanded and swelled with sympathy and befriended me. I was so distinctly made aware of the presence of something kindred to me, even in scenes which we are accustomed to call wild and dreary, and also that the nearest of blood to me and humanest was not a person nor a villager, that I thought no place could ever be strange to me again.
"Mourning untimely consumes the sad;Few are their days in the land of the living,Beautiful daughter of Toscar."
Some of my pleasantest hours were during the long rain-storms in the spring or fall, which confined me to the house for the afternoon as well as the forenoon, soothed by their ceaseless roar and pelting; when an early twilight ushered in a long evening in which many thoughts had time to take root and unfold themselves. In those driving northeast rains which tried the village houses so, when the maids stood ready with mop and pail in front entries to keep the deluge out, I sat behind my door in my little house, which was all entry, and thoroughly enjoyed its protection. In one heavy thunder-shower the lightning struck a large pitch pine across the pond, making a very conspicuous and perfectly regular spiral groove from top to bottom, an inch or more deep, and four or five inches wide, as you would groove a walking-stick. I passed it again the other day, and was struck with awe on looking up and beholding that mark, now more distinct than ever, where a terrific and resistless bolt came down out of the harmless sky eight years ago. Men frequently say to me, "I should think you would feel lonesome down there, and want to be nearer to folks, rainy and snowy days and nights especially." I am tempted to reply to such ―― This whole earth which we inhabit is but a point in space. How far apart,think you, dwell the two most distant inhabitants of yonder star,the breadth of whose disk cannot be appreciated by our instruments?
Why should I feel lonely? is not our planet in the Milky Way? This which you put seems to me not to be the most important question. What sort of space is that which separates a man from his fellows and makes him solitary? I have found that no exertion of the legs can bring two minds much nearer to one another. What do we want most to dwell near to? Not to many men surely, the depot, the post-office, the bar-room, the meeting-house, the school-house, the grocery, Beacon Hill, or the Five Points, where men most congregate,but to the perennial source of our life, whence in all our experience we have found that to issue, as the willow stands near the water and sends out its roots in that direction. This will vary with different natures, but this is the place where a wise man will dig his cellar…… I one evening overtook one of my townsmen, who has accumulated what is called "a handsome property" ―― though I never got a fair view of it ―― on the Walden road, driving a pair of cattle to market, who inquired of me how I could bring my mind to give up so many of the comforts of life. I answered that I was very sure I liked it passably well; I was not joking. And so I went home to my bed, and left him to pick his way through the darkness and the mud to Brighton ―― or Bright-town ―― which place he would reach some time in the morning.
然而我有時經歷到,在任何大自然的事物中,都能找出最甜蜜溫柔,最天真和鼓舞人的伴侶,即使是對于憤世嫉俗的可憐人和最最憂慢的人也一樣。只要生活在大自然之間而還有五官的話,便不可能有很陰郁的憂慮。對于健全而無邪的耳朵,暴風雨還真是伊奧勒斯的音樂呢。什么也不能正當地迫使單純而勇敢的人產生庸俗的傷感。當我享受著四季的友愛時,我相信,任什么也不能使生活成為我沉重的負擔。今天佳雨灑在我的豆子上,使我在屋里待了整天,這雨既不使我沮喪,也不使我抑郁,對于我可是好得很呢。雖然它使我不能夠鋤地,但比我鋤地更有價值。如果雨下得太久,使地里的種予,低地的土豆爛掉,它對高地的草還是有好處的,既然它對高地的草很好,它對我也是很好的了。有時,我把自己和別人作比較,好像我比別人更得諸神的寵愛,比我應得的似乎還多呢;好像我有一張證書和保單在他們手上,別人卻沒有,因此我受到了特別的引導和保護。我并沒有自稱自贊,可是如果可能的話,倒是他們稱贊了我。我從不覺得寂寞,也一點不受寂寞之感的壓迫,只有一次,在我進了森林數星期后,我懷疑了一個小時,不知寧靜而健康的生活是否應當有些近鄰,獨處似乎不很愉快。同時,我卻覺得我的情緒有些失常了,但我似乎也預知我會恢復到正常的。當這些思想占據我的時候,溫和的雨絲飄酒下來,我突然感覺到能跟大自然做伴是力矚此甜蜜如此受惠,就在這滴答滴答的雨聲中,我屋子周圍的每一個聲音和景象都有著無窮盡無邊際的友愛,一下子這個支持我的氣氛把我想象中的有鄰居方便一點的思潮壓下去了,從此之后,我就沒有再想到過鄰居這口事。每一支小小松針都富于同情心地脹大起來,成了我的朋友。我明顯地感到這里存在著我的同類,雖然我是在一般所謂凄慘荒涼的處境中,然則那最接近于我的血統,并最富于人性的卻并不是一個人或一個村民,從今后再也不會有什么地方會使我覺得陌生的了。
“不合宜的哀動消蝕悲哀;在生者的大地上,他們的日子很短,托斯卡爾的美麗的女兒啊。”
我的最愉快的若干時光在于春秋兩季的長時間暴風雨當中,這弄得我上午下午都被禁閉在室內,只有不停止的大雨和咆哮安慰著我;我從微明的早起就進入了漫長的黃昏,其間有許多思想扎下了根,并發展了它們自己。在那種來自東北的傾盆大雨中,村中那些房屋都受到了考驗,女傭人都已經拎了水桶和拖把,在大門口阻止洪水侵入,我坐在我小屋子的門后,只有這一道門,卻很欣賞它給予我的保護。在一次雷陣雨中,曾有一道閃電擊中湖對岸的一株蒼松,從上到下,劃出一個一英寸,或者不止一英寸深,四五英寸寬,很明顯的螺旋形的深槽,就好像你在一根手杖上刻的槽一樣。那天我又經過了它,一抬頭看到這一個痕跡,真是驚嘆不已,那是八年以前,一個可怕的、不可抗拒的雷霆留下的痕跡,現在卻比以前更為清晰。人們常常對我說,“我想你在那兒住著,一定很寂寞,總是想要跟人們接近一下的吧,特別在下雨下雪的日子和夜晚?!蔽液韲蛋W癢的直想這樣口答,――我們居住的整個地球,在宇宙之中不過是一個小點。那邊一顆星星,我們的天文儀器還無法測量出它有多么大呢,你想想它上面的兩個相距最遠的居民又能有多遠的距離呢?我怎會覺得寂寞?我們的地球難道不在銀河之中?在我看來,你提出的似乎是最不重要的問題。怎樣一種空間才能把人和人群隔開而使人感到寂寞呢?
我已經發現了,無論兩條腿怎樣努力也不能使兩顆心靈更形接近。我們最愿意和誰緊鄰而居呢?人并不是都喜歡車站哪,郵局哪,酒吧間哪,會場哪,學校哪,雜貨店哪,烽火山哪,五點區哪,雖然在那里人們常常相聚,人們倒是更愿意接近那生命的不竭之源泉的大自然,在我們的經驗中,我們時常感到有這么個需要,好像水邊的楊柳,一定向了有水的方向伸展它的根。人的性格不同,所以需要也很不相同,可是一個聰明人必需在不竭之源泉的大自然那里挖掘他的地窖……有一個晚上在走向瓦爾登湖的路上,我趕上了一個市民同胞,他已經積蓄了所謂的“一筆很可觀的產業”,雖然我從沒有好好地看到過它,那晚上他趕著一對牛上市場去,他間我,我是怎么想出來的,寧肯拋棄這么多人生的樂趣?我口答說,我確信我很喜歡我這樣的生活;我不是開玩笑。便這樣,我回家,上床睡了,讓他在黑夜泥濘之中走路走到布賴頓去――或者說,走到光亮城里去――大概要到天亮的時候才能走到那里。
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