遲到的情書(三)
"That was the happiest birthday of my life, for while we were resting between dances Richard took me outside into the cool, moonlit night, and there, under the stars ,he told me he loved me and asked me to marry him. Of course I promised I would, for I was too happy to think of what my parents would say, or indeed of anything except Richard was not at our meeting place as he had arranged. I was disappointed but not alarmed, for so many things could happen to either of us to prevent out keeping our tryst. I thought that next time we visited the Van Ransburgs, I should hear what had kept him and we could plan further meetings…
"從那以后,我們就盡可能多地見面,但往往是秘密進行。我們就這樣度過了將近1年時間。后來有一天,在他安排的約會處,理查德爽約沒有來。失望之際,我沒有大驚小怪,因為我們倆誰碰到形形色色的事都可能使我們無法幽會。我想我們以后去范?倫斯堡家看望之時,我就會明白理查德未能赴約的原因,再安排以后的約會……
"So when my father asked if I would drive with him to Driefontein I was delighted. But when we reached the homestead and were sitting on the stoep drinking our coffee, we heard that Richard had left quite suddenly and had gone back to England. His father had died, and now he was the heir and must go back to look after his estates.
"所以,當父親問我是否愿意和他一塊開車去德里方丹時,我就高興地答應了。但待我們趕到范?倫斯堡家,坐在他們家屋前的門廊上喝咖啡時,卻聽說理查德已經不辭而別回英國去了。他的父親死了,他是繼承人,不得不回去料理遺產。
"I do not remember very much more about that day, except that the sun seemed to have stopped shining and the country no longer looked beautiful and full of promise, but bleak and desolate as it sometimes does in winter or in times of drought. Late that afternoon, Jantje, the little Hottentot herd boy, came up to me and handed me a letter , which he said the English baas had left for me. It was the only love letter I ever received, but it turned all my bitterness and grief into a peacefulness which was the nearest I could get, then, to happiness. I knew Richard still loved me, and somehow, as long as I had his letter, I felt that we could never be really parted, even if he were in England and I had to remain on the farm. I have it yet, and though I am an old, tired woman, it still gives me hope and courage."
"那天的事我記不大清楚了,只記得當時陽光慘淡,田野也失去了美麗的豐采和欣欣向榮的景象,蕭瑟凄涼得跟冬天或大旱時一樣。那天傍晚,在我和父親動身回家之前,霍但托特族的小牧童詹杰交給我一封信,他說是那位英國老爺留給我的。這可是我有生以來收到的唯一的情書!它將我的憂傷一掃而光,使我的心情變得平靜――當時對我來說幾乎類似幸福的平靜。我知道理查德仍在愛著我。不知怎么回事,有了這封信,我便覺得我們不可能真正分開,哪怕他到了英國、我還留在南非的農場。這封信我至今仍保留著,盡管我已經年邁體衰,但它仍能帶給我希望和勇氣。"
I was always a little in awe of Great-aunt Stephina Roos. Indeed, as children we were all frankly terrified of her. The fact that she did not live with the family, preferring her tiny cottage and solitude to the comfortable but rather noisy household where we were brought up-added to the respectful fear in which she was held.
我對斯蒂菲娜老姑總是懷著敬畏之情。說實在話,我們幾個孩子對她都怕得要死。她不和家人一塊生活,寧愿住在她的小屋子里,而不愿住在舒舒服服、熱熱鬧鬧的家里――我們六個孩子都是在家里帶大的――這更加重了我們對她的敬畏之情。
We used to take it in turn to carry small delicacies which my mother had made down from the big house to the little cottage where Aunt Stephia and an old colored maid spent their days. Old Tnate Sanna would open the door to the rather frightened little messenger and would usher him-or her - into the dark voor-kamer, where the shutters were always closed to keep out the heat and the flies. There we would wait, in trembling but not altogether unpleasant.
我們經常輪替著從我們住的大房子里帶些母親為她做的可口的食品到她和一名黑人女仆一塊過活的那間小屋里去。桑娜老姨總是為每一個上門來的怯生生的小使者打開房門,將他或她領進昏暗的客廳。那里的百葉窗長年關閉著,以防熱氣和蒼蠅進去。我們總是在那里哆哆嗦嗦、但又不是完全不高興地等著斯蒂菲娜老姑出來。
She was a tiny little woman to inspire so much veneration. She was always dressed in black, and her dark clothes melted into the shadows of the voor-kamer and made her look smaller than ever. But you felt. The moment she entered. That something vital and strong and somehow indestructible had come in with her, although she moved slowly, and her voice was sweet and soft.
一個像她那樣身材纖細的女人居然能贏得我們如此尊敬。她總是身穿黑色衣服,與客廳里的陰暗背景融成一體,將她的身材襯托得更加嬌小。但她一進門,我們就感到有一種說不清道不明、充滿活力和剛強的氣氛,盡管她的步子慢悠、聲調甜柔。
She never embraced us. She would greet us and take out hot little hands in her own beautiful cool one, with blue veins standing out on the back of it, as though the white skin were almost too delicate to contain them.
她從不擁抱我們,但總是和我們寒暄,將我們熱乎乎的小手握在她那雙秀美清爽的手里,她的手背上露出一些青筋,就像手上白嫩的皮膚細薄得遮不住它們似的。
Tante Sanna would bring in dishes of sweet, sweet, sticky candy, or a great bowl of grapes or peaches, and Great-aunt Stephina would converse gravely about happenings on the farm ,and, more rarely, of the outer world.
桑娜阿姨每次都要端出幾碟粘乎乎的南非糖果和一缽葡萄或桃子給我們吃。斯蒂菲娜老姑總是一本正經他說些農場里的事,偶爾也談些外邊世界發生的事。
When we had finished our sweetmeats or fruit she would accompany us to the stoep, bidding us thank our mother for her gift and sending quaint, old-fashioned messages to her and the Father. Then she would turn and enter the house, closing the door behind, so that it became once more a place of mystery.
待我們吃完糖果或水果,她總要將我們送到屋前的門廊,叮囑我們要多謝母親給她送食品,要我們對父母親轉達一些稀奇古怪的老式祝愿,然后就轉身回到屋里,隨手關上門,使那里再次成為神秘世界。
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