英漢雙語笑話118

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1.The Mean Man's Party　　The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."　　"Why use my elbow and foot?"　　"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-handed, are you?"吝嗇鬼的聚會(huì)　　一個(gè)聲名狼藉的小氣鬼終于決定要請一次客了。他在向一個(gè)朋友解釋怎么找到他家時(shí)說：“你上到五樓，用你的胳膊肘按門鈴。門開了后，再用你的腳把門推開?！薄　　盀槭裁次乙梦业闹夂湍_呢？”　　“天哪！” 吝嗇鬼回答，“你總不會(huì)空著手來吧？” 2.Talking clock 　　會(huì)說話的鐘　　While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den. "What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked. "That is the talking clock," the man replied. "How's it work?" 　　"Watch," the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, "Knock it off, you idiot! It's two o'clock in the morning!" 　　一個(gè)學(xué)生帶他朋友們參觀他的新公寓，甚是得意?！澳莻€(gè)大銅鑼和錘子是干什么用的？”他的一個(gè)朋友問他。“那玩意兒厲害了，那是一個(gè)會(huì)說話的鐘”，學(xué)生回答?！斑@鐘怎么工作的”，他的朋友問。“看著，別眨眼了”，那學(xué)生走上前一把操起銅鑼和錘子，拼命地敲了一下，聲音震耳欲聾。突然，他們聽到隔壁墻那邊有人狂叫，“別敲了，你這白癡！現(xiàn)在是凌晨兩點(diǎn)鐘了！”

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