爆笑英語幽默笑話精選32： TA Lesson In Reading一節誦讀課（英漢雙語笑話）
32.A Lesson In Reading
32.一節誦讀課
I had a schoolmate who had come into school at an age later than usual，and could hardly read. There was a book used by the learners in reading called“Dialogues between a Missionary and an Indian”，It was a poor performance，full of inconclusive arguments and other commonplaces.The boy in question used to appear with this book in his hand in the middle of the school，the master standing behind him.
當年我有個同學，入學比常規的年齡要遲，而且幾乎完全不會讀書。那時有個學生用的閱讀課本，叫做《傳教士和印第安人的對話》。課本不怎么樣，盡是不得要領的論說和一些老生常談。那孩子常常手拿該課本出現在學校中央，身后站著教師。
The lesson was to begin.The poor fellow，whose great fault lay in a deep toned drawl of his syllable and the omission of his stops，stood half looking at the book，and half casting his eye towarcJs the right of him，whence the blows were to proceed. The master looked over him，and his hand was ready.I am not exact in my quotation at this distance of time;but the spirit of one of the passages that I recollect was to the following purport，and thus did the teacher and his pupil proceed:
授課即將開始。那可憐的學生的毛病在于他讀音節時語調深沉地拖長腔并略去應有的停頓。他站立著，三心二意地看著書，一面向身子右邊瞄去，因為打擊將會來自那個方向。教師盯視著他，手已擺出了打人的架勢。因為時隔已久，我的引述可能不很確切，但就我所憶，先生和學生的一次對話的要旨大致如下:
Master: Now，young man，have a care;or I’II set you a swinging task. (A common phrase of his.)
老師:“年輕人，小心點;要不我可要讓你狠狠吃點苦頭。”(這是他的口頭禪。)
Pupil faking a sort of heavy bolt at his calamity，and never remembering his stop at the word“Missionary"): Missionary Can you see the wind？(Master gives him a slap on the cheek.)
Pupil (raising his voice to a cry, and still forgetting his stop):Indian No!
學生:(大難臨頭，身體猛然一搖閃，根本記不得在“傳教士”一詞后應該停頓。)“傳教士你能看見風嗎?”(教師扇了他一耳光。)
Master: Zounds，young man ! have a care，how you provoke me
學生:(提高了嗓音，幾乎是在哭喊，但仍不記得要停頓)“印第安人不能啊!”
Pupil (always forgetting the stop): Missionary How then do you know that there is such a thing? (Here a terrible thump.)
教師:“該死!年輕人，小心點別惹我發火!”
Pupil(with a shout of agony):Indian Because I feel it.
學生:(一如既往漏掉停頓)“傳教士那你怎么知道有這樣一種東西呢?”(這時來了重重一擊。)
missionary
學生:(痛苦地叫喊)“印第安人因為我感覺到了。”
inconclusive
n. [C]傳教士;倡導者，鼓吹者;(外交)使節，使者
commonplace
adj.非決定性的;不確定的
drawl
n.C]司空見慣的事;老生常談;陳詞濫調
syllable
n.[C]}}吞吞拉長調子的說話方式
omission
n.[C]音節
whence
n.[U][C]省略;刪除
purport
adv.從那里;由此
bolt
n.(文章等的)意義，涵義，主旨
calamity
n.[C]沖撞
zounds
n.[C][U]災難;大禍;大災害(巨大的)不幸;苦難
thump
int.咄!(古時沮咒語)
n.[C]重擊;捶擊
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