雙語 笑話 男女大不同②
7. EATING OUT 從外出就餐看……
When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in a $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
結賬的時候，需然只花了32.5美元，馬克，克里斯，埃里克和湯姆也會每人都甩出20美元。沒人有更小的票子，也沒人愿意招認他們其實是想破錢。
When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
輪到女人結賬時，她們每個人會掏出個便攜式計算器。
8. MONEY 從花錢購物看……
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
只要用得著，即便值1美元卻賣2美元的東西，男人也會買。
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale.
只要在打折，2美元的東西只賣1美元，就算用不著，女人也會買。
9. CATS 從對貓的態度看……
Women love cats.
女人喜歡貓。
Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.
男人說他們喜歡貓，但是當女人不在場的時候，男人踢貓。
10. BATHROOMS 從浴室看……
A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.
男人浴室有五寶：牙刷，剃須膏，剃須刀，一塊肥皂和一塊毛巾。
The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.
女人浴室里平均有337樣東西，男人認不出其中的大多數是干什么用的。
11. ARGUMENTS 從爭論看……
A woman has the last word in any argument.
任何爭論都以女人說最后一句話為結束。
Anything a man says after that...is the beginning of a new argument.
男人在女人之后說的任何話……都將成為新一輪爭吵的開始。
12. OFFSPRING 從對孩子的態度看…
A woman know all about her children. She knows about romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
女人了解孩子的方方面面，包括他們的羅曼史，好朋友，喜歡的食物，心底的恐懼、希望以及夢想。
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
男人模模糊糊地知道和一些小人兒們住在一起。
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